BUILDING TRUST: Reclaim Your Creative Confidence

By Hannah Pietra, MS, LCAT, MT-BC, CLC

Self-doubt is an invasive vine. It creeps in and before you know it, it has taken up the majority of space in your mind. Then it moves on to your body, suffocating and shrinking your confidence as it goes. It leaves you feeling uncertain and uncomfortable. You trust the vine even though it is destructive because perhaps without it, something scarier might take its place. You use the vine as a barrier - except that the barrier now prevents you from blooming. 

If properly managed, doubt can help us stay motivated and prepared. When doubt is not well managed, unreasonable and hurtful self talk can prevent us from completing our creative work and feeling satisfied with it. Instead of trusting in our abilities and creative identity, we end up believing the fears, worries, and negative thoughts that pop into our heads. 

Self Doubt In The Arts-And-Entertainment Industry

In her book Counseling For Artists, Performers, and Other Creative Individuals: A Guide For Clinicians, psychotherapist Olga Gonithellis shares about why self-doubting thoughts occur easily within creative people. Gonithellis writes, “Doing something creatively means doing something different - going against norms, traditions, and conventions.” Gonithellis explains that due to the nature of the creative process and the risks involved, apprehension is likely to occur, particularly with the subjectivity that is involved with evaluating one’s own creative work and how it will be perceived. There is also a sense of vulnerability when sharing one’s art. Creative work reveals information about the creator’s feelings, thoughts, and perceptions, which can lead to second-guessing, overthinking, and hesitation. 

People in the arts-and-entertainment industry are particularly susceptible to self-doubt because of the high standards placed on physical appearance, competition, and repeated rejections. Most often creative people are not taught how to deal with these challenges and how to appropriately manage their doubts and insecurities. This is a big gap that I find in arts education programs. Many arts-and-entertainment industry professionals end up pushing their feelings and insecurities away instead of actually addressing the self-doubts. 

Comparisons and Self-Doubt 

My first experiences with self-doubt involved comparing myself to others due to the nature of competition. Starting in elementary school, I participated in solo piano and cello competitions, frequently auditioned for various orchestras, and then eventually competed for spots in college music programs. I was well aware of the many other very talented musicians out there, and it made me doubt my abilities. I doubted I was good enough to be a performer. When I made little mistakes in a performance I worried that people thought I was not a good musician. Self-doubt continued into my professional life. After I became more focused on clinical work as a creative arts therapist, I stopped performing as much. When I started getting back into performing and playing in orchestras more frequently I often thought, “I don’t belong here,” and “What if they find out I’m not really that good?” - despite being placed in the first or second chair. These thoughts led to anxiety before the first rehearsals causing difficulty sleeping the night before and an unsettled stomach. 

Developing Self-trust and Creative Confidence

How do we rip away the self-doubt vine or better yet, catch it from the start? The key is to develop self trust and to stop letting unhelpful thoughts rule us. We can do this by building our creative confidence and self-efficacy, as well as using different cognitive tools. The following are some strategies I have found helpful for myself and have used with clients. 

Catch, Challenge, Change

The first thing to do is simply “catch” that your self-talk is hurtful or unhelpful. Once you are more aware of your limiting beliefs and unhealthy thinking patterns, start to challenge the unhelpful thoughts. Think about the facts of the situation. Remember that thoughts themselves are not facts, they are just stories. Try to label the thoughts. For example “This is just the imposter story” or “This is my mind-reading trap.” Finally, replace the unhelpful thought with self-talk that is more encouraging and helpful. The one I often use for myself is “I deserve to be here, I’ve practiced for this.” Create affirmations that you can use during challenging situations.

Reflect On Successes 

It is important to recognize past successes. Doing so solidifies our creative identity. Even if the successes seem unimportant, it shows us that our creativity has made a positive impact at some point. Make a list of past creative successes and creative moments you are proud of. Keep this list in a location where you can easily look back to it for support. 

Give Yourself Permission To Make Mistakes

If we procrastinate or pass up opportunities in order to avoid making mistakes, we will miss out on chances to grow and learn. Come up with a plan for how you might handle possible rejections and trust that you can handle it. Remind yourself that things will be ok even if you get rejected and that making mistakes does not show your worth as an artist. Even the most sought-out performers and artists still make mistakes.

Sylvia Plath once said “The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.” The destruction caused by self-doubt often comes from a lack of self-trust. By being aware of the power of our thoughts, embracing vulnerability and failure, and turning our inner critic into a compassionate friend, we can learn to trust ourselves and reclaim our creative confidence. 

Hannah Pietra is a licensed creative arts therapist, board-certified music therapist and certified life coach based in Syracuse, NY. She has experience working with children, teens, and adults in hospital, clinic, school, and community based settings. Through her private practice Hannah provides clinical music therapy and psychotherapy services, as well as creative wellness workshops. Hannah is also the owner and founder of Iris Life and Creativity Coaching. She offers individual life and creativity coaching sessions. Hannah continues to be an active freelance cellist throughout New York State and performs with various ensembles.

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